Wow, I can’t believe it’s already April and in the year
2017. I should really type more entries
in my blog. Anyways, I know I said I was
supposed to lose weight last year and possibly attempt to contact my old crush
last year. Unfortunately looks like that’s
not going to happen. You know what
really surprised me around NYE 2017 I suddenly decided to stop “stalking” my
crush on social media and have not looked at his social media stuff since
then…. Sigh, it is not easy though but I
did not cheat and looked at his social media stuff since last year. What made me suddenly decide to stop looking
at his social media accounts and on of all days on NYE 2017? Well, while I was looking at one of his
accounts, I realized that this is getting me nowhere. Especially since I always look but never
actually go talk to him. Gosh, why do I
have to be such a big chicken? I can’t
even friend him on facebook or Instagram follower or even a simple “like” on
his pics! But it doesn’t matter, that’s
all in the past. If my secret crush was
even interested in me he would’ve at least made an effort to talk to me back in
high school, friend me on facebook, follow me on Instagram, “like” my pics,
etc. But that’s the thing, he never did. I admit, there’s a part of me that’s hoping
that he likes me and that he’s my secret admirer that’s been calling me all
these years but I have to realize that it’s all a dream/fantasy. I need to let him go. I’m getting older and this is going nowhere. I need to let him go and move on. (A few years ago, I posted a journal entry
about my secret admirer and hoping the universe will send him the message that
I want him to send me a love letter but looks like that’s never going to
happen. I have a feeling that whoever is
my secret admirer that he’s intimidated that I thought my secret admirer is
someone else. Well, that doesn’t matter
anymore. Both my secret crush and secret
admirer is never going to contact me and just tell me the truth about how they
feel about me. I need to find a man that
actually loves me and not ashamed/embarrassed to admit it. I’m only getting older and can’t do anything
to stop time. Sigh, I want to find my
true love already and get married to him already. I guess I’ll never know the truth about how
my secret crush really feels/thinks about me.
But I guess actions speaks louder than words in this situation.)
